5:05 AM
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Dear Ovipets,
If you haven't already figured out I was talking to you, I fear for the future of Ovipets, the game, not the person (people?).
Why what, you may ask, am I asking.
Well. I shall tell you now. I am asking,
WHY OVIPETS, WHY DID YOU COME OUT WITH THE NEW RATTUS SPECIES JUST BEFORE I LEFT FOR CHINA, THE LAND OF NO FACEBOOK, AND THEREFORE, NO OVIPETS, FOR 2 WEEKS?! WHY NOT IN THE EARLIER WEEKS OF NOVEMBER, WHEN I WAS LOYALLY CAMPING THERE FOR EVERYDAY, FOR AT LEAST 6 HOURS? WHY?!
Please R.S.V.P
Thank You.
Yours sincerely,
Me.
12:39 AM
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Dear World.
I am bored.
I think I am also in deep shit.
I think that the above two is a lethal combination.
I think that because when I am bored, I have nothing to do besides reiterating the fact that I am in deep shit in my mind, making me think I am in a deeper shit than I actually am.
...
I think I think too much.
Love,
Me.
1:12 AM
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Dear Internet...
I am highly aware I am reiterating the title. I doubt you mind though, since you're still publishing it, right?
At any rate, my point is not whether you mind that I am reiterating the title, since you're still publishing it. Rather, my purpose is, in actual fact, to point out the most frustrating and exasperating fact of life, that you stubbornly - not determinedly, stubbornly, since this is hardly a worthy cause - refuse to convey any sarcasm from one party utilizing you to communicate with another party. You have no idea - actually, you should - how this stubbornness of yours has caused misunderstandings so numerous and sundry that my fingers too, refuse to be able to count them anymore.
I sincerely hope that this message may have changed your mind, otherwise, I fear that you will lose several fans of yours to the more common, although perhaps, less popular, method of face-to-face talking. You have no idea the devastation this could wreck on you and your fellow computers.
Hence, I urge you to reconsider your notions and finally start conveying sarcasm.
Yours sincerely,
A sarcastic individual.
Dear You, once again,
You MAY be getting tired of reading 'Dear You',
However, I believe it is better to be 'Dear You', as opposed to 'OI!"
Therefore, you are going to see much of this.
Suck it up.
